


We'll Go Down In History

by NeverlandAwaitsUs



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Drabble Collection, F/M, Ficlet Collection, Multi, One Shot Collection, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-29 00:11:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6351124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverlandAwaitsUs/pseuds/NeverlandAwaitsUs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A place where I collect all the drabbles and one shots I've only posted on Tumblr so far. They'll be 99,9% Captain Swan or will center around either Emma or Killian and another relationship that's important to them.</p>
<p>G-Rating mostly just for the overall thing, individual rating on the beginning of every fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Poison Under Your Skin

**Summary:** _Emma has been a vampire for quite some time now but last night, she met a man who was different._  
  
**Rated** : _T_

**_[Visual Aid](http://33.media.tumblr.com/959e3498b19878d4c5bfcea5fa640277/tumblr_inline_nhxsu36b811ragshr.png) _ **

* * *

 

Her eyes fell on him again when she was about to leave to the bathroom to clean herself. It shouldn't have happened.

It had been a mistake and she just knew.

This man, who was currently sleeping in her bed at the hotel where she was staying, looked so peaceful – except for the wound on his neck. She hadn't been able to stop herself. It had never happened like this before.

She had been a vampire for a while now, maybe a couple of years. She was usually able to control herself very well but this – this was different. Her whole life she'd picked up different men in different cities, in clubs and bars, she had seduced them and lured them into her room only to get some fresh blood. They never remembered her, a special skill she had, even though she didn't know where it came from.

Being a vampire was weird and twisted and dark. She didn't want to accept it, didn't try to find out who'd bitten her, didn't want to find out more about what it meant. It had never come to her mind that these things would exist and here she was, one of these damn blood suckers.

But last night, last night was one big mistake. She had been out on the streets of New York, had found a huge bar with many people, perfect to hide in the crowd, waiting for her victim, but, to her surprise, she hadn't found one.

No, he had found her.

Had talked to her even though she had brushed him off in the beginning but he told her he loves a challenge and he got under her skin.

After a few drinks and sweet talking they ended up here, in her bed, tangled in sheets and sweat and... blood. She had bitten him in the state of bliss after her orgasm.

Mistake, mistake, mistake.

She normally bit men when they were asleep and not when they would be able to see it immediately.

But this man had looked at her like she was the sun and the moon at the same time, his sea blue eyes had burned into her memory that she hadn't been able to control herself. Her teeth had found his neck but he didn't scream, kept quiet, even when she changed their position and rolled on top of him.

Her mind ran wild while she tried to remember why she hadn't been able to stop herself. It was his blood. It had to be his blood. As soon as the smell came to her nose and the taste on her tongue she hadn't been able to stop, she just kept drinking from him until he had trouble breathing. When she had pulled back his face was pale and he passed out.

Normally she didn't care but this didn't normally happen. She had started to press down on his wound, her fangs had wandered too deep this time while she had been in trance and it had almost killed him.

This was the reason she needed to clean herself now. After pressing down on his wound to stop the bleeding her hands got bloody and she had panicked, which was the reason why her face was covered with blood instead of only her mouth.

The issue was, Emma Swan didn't panic.

Emma Swan didn't care about men, she'd killed before, it shouldn't be a problem now.

But there was something about this man that had her worried.

For his luck he didn't bleed out because she found the first aid box and put a bandage around his neck, it would do for a while. He was asleep anyway and looked more colorful than before. She wondered if his eyes were still as blue as she remembered.

Emma shook her head and headed to the bathroom, washing the blood off her face but then she heard how he groaned in the next room. She hurried up as she wanted to be out of the hotel room before he woke up and saw her. Her skills should be able to make him forget and the wound...well, that was his problem, not hers because she would be out of here any second after she got her stuff.

She snuck back into the bedroom and gathered her purse, about to put her jacket on when her eyes meet the blue she would remember for the rest of her life.

(And that was a damned long time.)

He had sat up in the bed and leaned against the headboard, his hand covering the wound on his neck.

„You bit me. Thought you were going to bloody kill me," he said like it was the most normal thing in the world and she narrowed her eyes at him but kept pulling her jacket on.

„You remember," she said, slightly breathless because this normally didn't happen. This was what she'd always been afraid of.

That someone would remember her.

„Aye.“ He nodded and looked at her before he got out of bed and bend down, grabbing his boxer shorts and pulling them on.

She took a moment to let her eyes wander over his body, the one she had admired last night for quite some time. He had a sixpack, was quite muscular and his chest hair was delicious.

Normally the men were just some toy for her, she didn't spend so much time looking at them, she just wanted their blood, but this one was quite the sight.

„And you're not freaked out.“ She wasn't going to have a 'Yes –look, I'm a vampire' conversation now but why was he so calm? He should scream, be afraid, but, instead, he looked at her like she was normal, not some freak who just drank his blood.

„Nah, not really my style, love," he shrugged with a huge grin on his face and she frowned, what was the deal with this guy?

Before she could ask a question she felt dizzy and needed to put her hands on the table in front of her or she would have fallen down. She closed her eyes and groaned in pain when the headache suddenly appeared.

„Fuck. What is this?“ She mumbled but he just chuckled darkly.

Emma gritted her teeth and stood up straight, didn't want to look weak in front of him but she regretted it the second she looked in his blue eyes again because she suddenly lost the strenght to keep herself on her feet and fell right into his arms, the world going dark around her.

„See, love? This is why vampires aren't supposed to drink werewolf blood.“


	2. Red Roses

**Summary:** _I’m a florist and you keep buying flowers from me and what do you mean it was my fault we didn’t get together earlier you were buying flowers i assumed you had a lover au_  
  
**Ratied:** _G_

* * *

 

He had started to come by a while ago.

Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome.

She had never seen him around before, maybe he’d just moved here or something like that. Her little flower shop wasn't in the middle of the town and, as a result, not many people came by every day. Regardless, it was a good deal she’d made when she took it over from an old friend. She had needed to get out of her little town anyway, so she seized the opportunity.

She didn't lie when she said that Blue Eyes (what she called him in her head and when she was talking to Elsa) made her life a lot more exciting for at least five minutes every day. He always came by at 5pm, probably right after work, and bought a single rose.

Her heart always fluttered a little when she heard the door’s bell ring and he came in with these intense blue eyes and his dark hair and that stubble on his cheeks and his leather jacket and god, someone would think she was a little in love with him but he was just really, really handsome. And that accent.

God, his accent.

Too bad that all of this probably belonged to his girlfriend. Why else would he buy a single red rose every day? It was a sign of love, most of the time at least, and she doubted he would buy them for his mother. Sometimes she wished she could have a love like that, where her man would bring her home a rose every day. Yes, it was a little bit cheesy but romance was lost in this world these days so she really wouldn't mind it. Of course she would tell no one about that side of her, her life has been rough enough that she couldn't afford romance. One Night Stands was the only thing she did, once in a while, to scratch the itch.

When it was close to 5pm she got all giggly and looked in the mirror in the back room where she spent most of the time as it wasn't a busy job. As soon as she heard the door’s bell she started grinning before she tried to put her work face back on and walked out into the main room where he was already looking around in the shop. He always did that. Looking around like he had no idea what to buy but he always knew. Always a single rose.

„Hey there,” she said with a friendly smile and he looked over her, returning the smile and it made her heart flutter a little again.

(Damn him.)

„Hello, love,” he said and swaggered over to her, leaning against the counter and poking his tongue against the inside of his cheek. „I'd like to have—”

„A single red rose?“ She interrupted him with a soft laugh and he raised an eyebrow with an amused grin on his face.

„So obvious, hm?“ He asked and leaned back a little, running his hand through his slightly-wet hair. It has been raining most of the time, but she so didn't mind. When a dark lock fell back over in his face she got the urge to push it away stopped herself.

„Just give me a moment,“ Emma said and walked away to the counter where the roses were. She always made sure he got the best looking one.

They never talked much when he was here. He would greet her, she would greet him, he would order, she would deliver, and that was it. She had never dared to ask for his name or anything else, even though she wanted to – she really did. But, this was work, nothing else and he was just some really nice eye candy. She also never asked for what the roses were for, he would probably think she was dumb if she couldn't see that it was for his love.

„So, Swan, are you ever going to tell me your first name?“ He suddenly asked and she frowned while looking at the roses and turned around with one of them in her hand, frowning at him. Of course he would knew her last name from the shop's name 'Swan's flowers' (creative, yes) but why would he be interested in her first name?

„Why should I do that?“ She asked, trying to sound casual when she walked back to the counter, just to see how he shrugged.

„I come here quite often, figured it would be fair to know your name.“ He grinned at her and she bit her bottom lip while putting the paper around the flower so it wouldn't get too wet when he was back outside.

„Shouldn't you start with a name then?” She asked with a cheeky grin on her lips and handed him the flower, leaning over the counter a little. Shit, she was flirting, wasn't she?

„Jones,“ he said simply and held his free hand out and she took it with a smile while her look showed a little confused. „First name when I know yours.“ He winked at her, gave her the same money as every day before he left the shop.

For a moment she stared at the closed door before she groaned, running a hand through her hair.

Where did all that come from?

* * *

 

The whole next day she had considered what harm it could do to tell him her name and she couldn't find anything that was really bad. He could probably search her on the internet but she had always been careful with that so he wouldn't be able to find anything there. And she really thought he just wanted to be friendly, nothing else.

So when he came in at 5pm again and the door’s bell rang, she was already waiting for him at the counter, looking down on her phone.

„Hello, love,“ he said with his usual, happy voice when he came closer and she looked up, smiling at him.

„Not love. Emma.“ She really didn't think anything when she spoke and just put her phone away, giggling a little at the gobsmacked face he had on while standing in the middle of the shop. He apparently didn't think that she would really tell him her first name.

„What?“ she asked and tilted her head a little and he moved again, coming closer to lean against the counter.

„Nothing. I'm Killian,“ he answered with a grin on his face and she smiled but shook her head before walking over to the roses again, picking the best one and wrapping paper around it when she was back behind the counter.

„You haven’t lived here for that long, right?“ For a moment she stopped dead in her tracks when she realized what she had said. Wow Emma, good move, ask the handsome half stranger about personal things. You look so smart now. She cringed and wanted to take her words back but when she handed him the flower he just smiled at her.

„Aye. Moved here from Ireland a few weeks ago because of a job“, he answered her honestly, she could see it in his eyes before he bowed slightly, putting the money on the counter and left the shop.

He never said goodbye.

* * *

 

The next days weren't as usual. He came by as always, still buying the single flower, but they actually talked for a little. About how their days have been and simple things like that. She learned that he was working as a Journalist at the local newspaper, he learned that she loved her job a lot even though it could get boring.

(Of course, she didn't tell him that he made it better.)

(Of course, he never told her who the roses were for.)

When it was 5pm again he didn't come in with his usual swagger, he literally burst into the shop, cursing loudly. Emma tilted her head to the side to watch how he closed the door, he was wet from head to toes. She hadn't even realized that it was raining as she had spent most of the day in the back room, watching some shows on her laptop as she had nothing else to do. Now she knew why no one else had come by, the rain let people stay inside.

„Bad day?“ she said when he groaned loudly, muttering curses under his breath.

„I was already wet enough and then this stupid cab drove through that bloody big puddle of stupid water and bloody hell, what even is that day,“ he growled before he sighed, trying to calm himself.

„Come here.” She waved at him so that he would come closer before she vanished in the back for a second, coming out with a towel. „That's all I can do.“

He smiled at her when he took the towel, their fingers brushing slightly and she swallowed when the touch felt electric, giving her goosebumps. When he ran a hand through his wet hair and it stood up in odd places she started to laugh and he just raised an eyebrow.

„What?“ he asked, tilting his head and looked at her in confusion.

„Nothing, it's just...you look like a wet dog“ she answered and held her hand in front of her mouth, trying to stifle the laugh but he just raised an eyebrow before he looked at her in mischief.

„Oh yeah? Don't dogs do this?“ Without a warning he shook his head and the water droplets flew around and she just lifted her hands in protection.

„Killian, stop!“, she said and laughed and he joined her laugh before rubbing the towel over his head. „You're unbelievable.“ She shook her head with a smile and walked over to the roses to get him his usual order.

„Aye, most women tell me that“, he answered and she cringed a little, not only at his words but also at the fact that it sounded that he was close. When she turned around and wanted to walk back to the counter she crashed in him, hissing slightly when the thorn of the rose cut her hand.

„Shit.“ Emma groaned and walked to the counter, placing the rose on there and looking around for something to clean it off.

„I'm sorry, love“, Killian said and walked back to the counter but she just waved him off but he grabbed her wrist, pulling it towards him carefully and she looked up at him in confusion before he put the towel he had used around her hand. It wasn't like a deep cut or anything, a simple patch would have been enough but there was something in that gentle gesture that she didn't say anything.

When he was done he pulled the money out of his back pocket and placed it on the counter, taking the rose just like that and winked at her. „Have a good day.“

* * *

 

She was falling in love with him.

Every single day she fell more in love with him, every time he stopped by and smiled at her like she was the sun to the darkness.

Of course she would never admit it because it was stupid and he had a girlfriend but he was so nice, so dorky, so stupid and so handsome. He had a good heart and she felt like he wasn't like everyone else.

Their routine never changed. She got through the day until 5pm, until he came in and they talked a little, they laughed a little but after mostly fifteen minutes he was gone. Going home to his girlfriend to give her the rose, telling her how much he loved her.

Emma sighed and sank back on the chair behind the counter, putting her arms on the wood with a small pout. Why always her? Why did she always meet man who were taken? Or gay? Or simply so stupid that she couldn't stand them? But he, he was a dream so far. She was sure that he had his little issues and problems too, like every human being but she was also sure that she could overlook it.

Today was quite the warm day, she had her door opened this morning and didn't close it yet, so no chance to hear the door’s bell ring, hence the reason why she had to sit at the counter most of the time. The day had been more busy than usual, more people had come in to buy some flowers, maybe for a date or something but she didn't care about all of them, she only cared about him.

When it was 5pm she was nervous because he wasn't there yet. Her foot was tapping on the ground, her fingers were drumming on the counter while she tried to stay calm. Just the thought of him not coming by anymore made her sad as he had become a part of her daily routine. He made her days better and brighter.

She sighed in relieved when she saw him at the other side of the road but swallowed immediately when she saw that he wasn't alone. A dark haired woman was in his arm. His girlfriend. Gosh, she knew it. She knew he was taken and she was falling in love with him. That was so stupid. He kissed the other woman on the cheek before he let her out of his arm and she kept walking while he came over, swaggering into the store as usual.

„Hello, love“, he said and grinned at her, apparently in a good mood. Even though she had told him his first name he kept calling her love all the time.

„Hey.“ She tried to put a smile on but the knot in her stomach was heavy, just as the lump in her throat. Without saying anything else she walked over to the roses and picked one for him, just as she always did.

„Something the matter?“, he asked, tilting his head to the side and when she looked at him she could see how his blue eyes were filled with worry and confusion. She sighed, shaking her head.

„Busy day so I'm quite tired, sorry.“ Of course it was a lie and in the way his face shifted, he knew but he didn't say anything about it.

She handed him the flower and when he took it, her eyes fell on his wrist that was covered with scars. A frown showed up on her face as she had never seen this before, probably because he mostly walked around in a leather jacket and not in a t-shirt like today. She wanted to ask him where it came from as it looked really bad but she didn't, she just took the money he handed her and without a word, he was out again.

When she came home this evening she just sank down her front door after closing it and cried in her hands.

She was falling in love with a taken man and this was so stupid.

* * *

 

The next days she avoided talking to him more than she had to and the more days passed by, the more he seemed to notice and when he came in today, his smile was gone and his lips were pressed into a firm line as soon as he saw her.

She sighed and wanted to walk over to the roses but before she could he caught her arm, turning her around to him.

„Can you tell me what's wrong?“, he asked but she ripped her arm away from him, just grabbing the rose that was next to her, not the prettiest one, not like always.

„Nothing“, she simply said, avoiding his intense gaze that was burning on her skin.

„You're avoiding me. You barely talk to me anymore. What is wrong?“ He sounded so desperate and it almost broke her heart how he was looking at her when she lifted her gaze, his oh so blue eyes were filled with something she couldn't tell but it hurt to look at them.

„I'm just tired. You're a fine guy, Killian but you can't come by anymore.“ Her voice was shaking when she spoke these words but she knew it was for the best, for both of them. She had to protect herself, to protect her fragile, little heart that was broken so many times and she really didn't want to ruin his relationship with anything she said or did.

„Why not?“, he asked and he sounded so sad and it broke her heart, almost. She swallowed and shook her head before walking around the counter, giving him the rose.

„That's the last one. Ever. Please don't come back anymore.“ She avoided his gaze again and just cringed when he took the rose and closed his hand around hers in the progress. For a moment she was about to just push him away but she let his hands linger, just for a second before she turned around.

„Don't you want me here anymore?“ His accent had gotten thicker the sadder he got and she took a deep breath, was about to snap before she turned around to him again, tears in her eyes.

„I want you more than you can imagine but please, go now.“ She had never planned to admit it. He had never planned to kiss her. But within a second his lips were on hers, pressing against her in a soft movement and she sighed, closing her eyes, stealing the moment as long as she could.

But when she realized what they were doing she put her hands firm on his chest, her tears rolling down her cheeks now while she shook her head.

„That's a mistake. Go, please go. Your girlfriend wouldn't like any of this.“ Emma turned around again, walking into the room at the back of the shop, she didn't want to look at him or to hear him or anything.

„Emma, let me explain!“

It was the last thing she heard before she closed the door, trying to wipe the tears with the back of her hand. She was so stupid because she knew she wouldn't be able to forget this kiss.

* * *

 

He didn't come by the next days. She missed him so much and she had no idea how to fix this. It was her fault he wasn't coming by anymore. She was the one who told him to go, she was the one who told him to never come back.

A heavy sigh left her mouth when she settled down with her morning paper on a Saturday, free from work, free of worrying about him, if he would come by or not. He wouldn't. Never again and it was her fault.

She looked through the paper, hoping to find an article of him that she could read but instead, she found a picture of him and frowned.

„Local Journalist died in car accident“, she read out loud and she stopped breathing for a moment. No. No that couldn't be. Her eyes looked over the words who were written under his picture and she started shaking. He was dead. Just...dead. Gone. Gone like she wanted him to. He died yesterday, only a hour after she had sent him out. Oh god, she should never have done that.

Tears were running down her face while she stared down on the paper, on his smiling picture, probably the last one they had of him. If she wouldn't have sent him away he wouldn't have been there to the time of the accident. If she wouldn't have been afraid of actually talking to him he would be alive...

She swallowed and closed her eyes before she grabbed her jacket, slipped into her shoes and made her way down to the shop without a second thought.

When she opened it the smell of flowers didn't even reach her nose, what was she doing here anyway? He wouldn't come by, she knew it. But maybe, just maybe if she waited long enough, he would show up. Maybe it was all a mistake, maybe...maybe she was lying to herself.

For a second she touched her lips, remembering how he had kissed her. The kiss hadn't been a mistake. She didn't regret it but she regretted that she had sent him away. She walked towards the counter and frowned when she a folded piece of paper stuffed under the vase where she had the roses. She hadn't touched them since he had been here the last time. She took the paper and opened it, frowning when she saw it was a letter.

_'Dear Emma,_

_I don't know what was wrong with you these last days, I just know that it's probably my fault and I want to apologize, for whatever I have done. You're the most beautiful and most perfect woman I have ever met and I just wanted to let you know that. Kissing you made me feel alive and I'm really sorry if I have offended you or something. I have no girlfriend like you said, I don't even know why you got that thought. Fact is, I want to get to know you but I was too much of a coward to ask you out and when I'm close to you, my thoughts run wild and I can't get the right words out._

_But I will follow your wish and not come back unless you want me to. I left my number at the bottom of this letter, so, if you can forgive me, please call me, I'd really like to get to know you better and invite you for a coffee._

_Sincerely, Killian Jones.'_

She didn't know when she had started crying but the tears were streaming down her face like a river now and she had no idea how to stop it. It had been a misunderstanding and now he was gone and she had no way to fix it. He was just gone.

And he didn't even say goodbye.

* * *

 

Emma woke up with tears on her face and with heavy breathing. For a moment she looked around disoriented before she realized she was in her living room, safe and sound. She wiped her tears away with the back of her hand, such a stupid dream. She must have fallen asleep on the couch at some point during the movie last night.

But the glance on her phone told her that it was indeed Saturday and she swallowed. She patted barefeet towards the front door to get the paper with her shaking hands. She just prayed that it didn't say the same thing as in her dream and she had no idea why she was so afraid of losing him. Maybe she was more in love than she thought.

After getting the paper she walked back to the couch, sitting down and just skipping through the pages until she got to the local news. Her eyes flew over the page and she sighed in relief when there was nothing written about his death. She started to laugh a little at herself, that was so dumb. It had been a dream and yet she had been anxious to read the paper.

A knock at the door let her lift her head and she frowned, it was way too early for Elsa, the only person who really came by on Saturdays. She fixed her hair for a moment, she probably looked really stupid and tired and whiny right now but she couldn't care less. It had been a nightmare and nothing else.

When she opened the door she saw nothing but when she looked to the ground she saw a single rose laying there. A frown showed up on her forehead when she looked around again but no one was there. She walked forward to take the rose only to now see another on the staircase. Great joke, really but if she wouldn't take them, her neighbours would blame her for this mess and kill her.

Emma just collected the next flower but got suspicious when she saw another one. Every time just a single red rose, some more fresh than others. She walked down her whole apartment block and opened the main front door only to see him standing there with a single rose in his hand. Safe, and sound, and alive.

She opened her mouth to say something but she didn't know what. He just looked at her with a smile and took a step forward, holding the rose out so she could take it and she did, with a shaking hand.

„Before you say anything, I'm sorry. It's just a big misunderstanding. I didn't come by to get flowers for my girlfriend every day. It was actually just so I had a reason to see you and I kept them all until they died. These are the rest of them. I'm sorry I didn't visit you anymore but I didn't want to invade your space. I like you, Emma. I like you a lot and-“

He wasn't able to finish his sentence because her lips were on his in a heartbeat. A kiss full of relief that he was alive, full of love because she had fallen in love with him so hard. Slowly at first and then, all at once. He must have put the pieces of her minds together in the last few ways, trying to figure out why she had been mad at him but now, now it was okay.

„I take that you accepted the apology?“, he asked when they pulled away and Emma smiled at him and nodded.

„I'm sorry, too, I—” He interrupted her with a finger on her lips before he placed another kiss on them.

„No more apologies, love. It's all okay now.“

She invited him over to stay the day with him and they talked a lot more than in the past two months they had seen each other. She learned that he had lost his first love in a car accident and that he had scars on his wrist because he had almost lost his hand back then. He learned that she was an orphan and that she had always been afraid of losing people. She learned that the black haired woman was his best friend Ruby, the only childhood friend he had left.

But most important was that both of them learned that they love each other.


	3. Be My Eyes

**Summary:** _Emma is blind but there's something about his voice that makes her feel like she could see right into his soul._

 **Rated:** _G_

* * *

**Three times she wished to see him and the one time she could.**

The first time she wished she could see him was the time they met at David and Mary Margaret‘s housewarming party. It wasn’t a huge party, only close friends and relatives were gathered in the house, the porch and the garden. David was in front of the grill wearing a ridiculous apron while his wife was in the kitchen, finishing the salad to bring it outside.

Killian came in through the garden door as usual, a six pack of beer under his arm. He greeted David with a rough pat on the shoulder so that his friend almost lost the tongs and only cursed him back as a welcome. The Irishman laughed and shook his head before he put the six pack down on the table while he knocked on it, greeting some of his friends who were sitting there. As soon as Mary Margret came out he took her hand and placed a soft kiss on the back of it and only got a laugh and a hug as a greeting.

Emma Swan wasn’t able to see any of this. Cursed by a disease, she had lost her vision, was blind since youth but she had come to accept it, it wasn’t a huge deal for her. Not anymore. She had accepted that she would be blind for the rest of her life and just wanted to enjoy her day here with her friends as she barely went to such events, but today was special so she had agreed when David has asked her.

„His apron is ridiculous, eh?“

She frowned and turned her head to the side from where the male voice came and she didn’t even need to see it to know that he was probably right. She actually didn’t expect someone to join her here, especially not someone with such a strong voice, covered with an accent, Irish probably.

„Well, if you say so, it must be true.“

He didn’t answer her immediately and she knew that he was probably thinking about her words. She could literally follow his thoughts, maybe even the way his eyes made from her dark sunglasses towards the little bandage that told people that she was blind.

„Oh god, I’m sorry,“ he answered and she could hear him swallow, it must be embarassing for him but she got this kind of encounter a lot in her life so she wasn’t offended by his words and just laughed softly. His voice was nice so how was she able to be mad or something?

„It’s fine. I’m Emma. Doesn’t sound like I know you.“ She turned slightly in his direction and held her hand out and he hesitated for a second before he took it carefully, squeezing it slightly. He had actually never dealt with a blind person before and David never told him they had a blind friend.

„I’m Killian, it’s nice to meet you.“ He may have held her hand a little too long and stared at her dark sunglasses she was wearing, obviously trying to hide her eyes and he felt sorry for her because it was such a beautiful day and she couldn’t see a damn thing.

When he finally let go of her hand she turned around a little more in his direction, knowing where he sat now. She lifted her hands a little and tilted her head like she was looking at him and he bit his bottom lip.

„Let you feel me how you look?“ she said with a soft chuckle and he was quite happy that she couldn’t see his dumb face right now because she was stunning in every way and it was such a shame that she wasn’t allowed to see.

„Sure!“ He took her hands and brought them to his face. Her fingertips ran over his skin as soft as the touch of a feather, careful to reach every single spot on his face to get a better feeling of what he may look like. He didn’t know what to do so he just smiled slightly and her touch felt like electric shocks on his face in every positive way he could imagine.

„Handsome“ she finally said after a few moments and took her hands back and he just laughed, glad she couldn’t see the slight blush on his cheeks after she had caressed him.

* * *

The second time she wished to see him more than anything else was on their first real date. They had met at several occasions until now, mostly with other people somewhere around but this time they were completely alone for the first time.

She couldn’t deny that she had butterflies in her stomach whenever he was with her, whenever he was talking to her and she had fallen for his voice since the first time they had met all these weeks ago. His thick accent was adorable and sexy at the same time, his face had felt good, his stubble and his locks. He had told her he has blue eyes and dark hair and she would give everything to be able to see him at least one time in her life.

The only place where she could see him was in her dreams and every night without a dream about him was a lost night for her. Sure, she couldn’t exactly know what he looked like but she had a picture in her mind and would hold on to that, it’s not like there was a chance that she could ever see him.

Tonight had been quite difficult, especially for him. Trying to find a date idea hadn’t been easy but then he had called her and asked her out for dinner and of course she had agreed. She knew that a normal first date would maybe be a fancy restaurant but he had told her not to dress up too much because they wouldn’t do such a thing. Another normal idea would be to watch a movie, maybe cook together but that was also out with her so she had been quite surprised when he came to pick her up.

He hadn’t told her what he had planned on the whole way and only when he helped her out of the car she had an idea as soon as the sound of waves came to her ear. They were at a sea or the ocean, she wasn’t sure but he kept quiet until he lifted her completely up in his arms and she let out a soft squeal of surprise.

They stepped on a boat and he put her down into a comfortable chair and she couldn’t stop smiling at the idea of being on a boat, on the water as she always wanted that but everyone told her it might be too dangerous for her.

„I told you about my boat, right? The one I got from my brother after he died? Well, I figured it would be nice to go out on the ocean. Got some food, too.“

She smiled even more at his words and turned his head from where his voice was coming. He gave her the basket of food before he got behind the wheel and they didn’t need long to get away from the docks on the ocean. He sat down next to her and took her hand in his, leaning back and she snuggled closer to him, taking his smell in.

„Tell me how it looks,” she said in a whisper while her head lay on his chest and she heard how his heart was beating faster than it should and she knew it was because of her. She loved it. Loved him. She didn’t need to know what he looked like, he was perfect just as he was.

„It’s quite dark, the only light is coming from some lanterns here on the ship and the full moon that is shining down on us. The sky is clear and you can see the stars. Damn, I would love to teach you about them, tell you everything my brother taught me all these years ago.“

His voice broke towards the end and she shifted, placing her head in his lap and looking up at the sky but only seeing darkness. His fingers ran through her hair, playing with her locks and she felt that he was tense when he brought her hand that he was holding up to her lips to place a kiss on it.

„Killian?“ she asked and her voice was trembling while she had her eyes closed and tried to imagine the whole scene.

„Yes, love?“

Emma waited for a long moment, biting her bottom lip in insecurity, not quite sure how to tell him what she wanted to tell. She had never done this before, no one has ever cared about her before like he did and she felt so safe here with him.

„Be my eyes?“

For a second he was afraid when he didn’t answer but then he leaned down and kissed her softly and she knew he had understood what her question had actually meant. He wouldn’t leave her. Never.

* * *

 The third time where she would have given anything she had to see him was the time when he was leaving her. When he told her that she needed to go as it was her only chance and she didn’t even understand what he meant.

She sat in her hospital bed and shook her head again and again, her body still aching from the accident she had been in, not knowing he was blaming himself for all of this.

„I never wanted you to get hurt, Emma! So please, go into the special clinic and they will be able to help you.“

His words sounded desperate and she didn’t even know what he meant. Sure, she had told him about this special treatment in a clinic far away, so far that he couldn’t go with her and she didn’t want to be without him. She also never had the money to get her eyes done, the risk was way too high and the chance that she could actually see again was so low that she never really thought about it.

Maybe it had been a mistake to tell him. Maybe the whole thing with him was a mistake because now they were men in front of her door who wanted to take her away and she had no idea what was going on, only he was here, holding her hand, _begging_ her to go with them because everything would get better, everything would make sense one day and she just didn’t know what to do.

„Please, Emma. It’s your only chance. Next time you might…not—“ His voice broke and she knew that the thought of her almost dying in that accident was killing him. She hadn’t been able to see and now she was here, with wounds all over her body but alive because he had pulled her out in the right time.

She knew that he probably just wanted the best for her but it was her decision and right now it just felt like he was pushing her away, that he wouldn’t be able to love this blind woman any minute longer, that he was rejecting her like everyone else did all her life. She had never expected him to be like everyone else. He had been special to her, he still was. He had been her eyes in all the weeks they had spent together, as a couple, in a real relationship.

The young woman couldn’t see the tears in his eyes while he was holding her hand, rocking back and forth, hoping she would agree. She didn’t know about his plans, what he had in mind, what he had done to make her operation possible. She just knew the chance was here and she should take it but she was so afraid that she couldn’t even move.

„So, what? You’re sending me away for god knows how long so you can do what? Get rid of me?“ She didn’t want to sound so angry, she knew it was unfair but everything was so confusing right now and she just wished she could see him, his face, knowing if he was lying or not even if she already knew that he was honest to her.

„What? No! I promised you that I will never leave you. I wanted to be your eyes but now you have to take the chance to get your vision back. I will wait for you but you have to go now. I love you, Emma. I love you more than anything else in the world and I don’t want to push you but imagine how it would be if you could see me.“

He stopped for a moment and she felt how tense he was when he was about to get up but she kept holding his hand and he stopped in his movement, sitting down on her bed to run his free hand over her cheek.

„I’m afraid, too. That you might not want me as soon as you can see again. That you might run away because I’m not what you expected, not what you wanted.“

Then she slapped him, more playfully than serious because he was a dumb idiot for thinking she would do this. He was the love of her life, his look wouldn’t change anything and she knew from the moment she met him that he was handsome.

„How?“

„How what, love?“

She groaned and tried to sit up more in her hospital bed but he pressed her back down gently and she rolled her eyes, not able to see as she was still hiding them behind her dark glasses.

„How did you pay for it? I know that I didn’t, and you don’t have much money either…“

He just huffed and apparently shook his head before he leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead, still holding her hand, he’d never let go of it since he had come inside.

„Well, I was able to make quite a good price for the Jolly Roger.“

Her eyes widened and she swallowed, he had sold his boat to pay her bills for the operation. The boat that had been the only thing he had left from his brother. A single tear ran down her cheek, coming out behind the glasses but he stopped it with his thumb, wiping it away.

„Why?“ she sobbed out and it was hurting her that he had sold his boat because she knew how much it had meant to him but he just laughed and took her sunglasses away.

She closed her eyes fast, didn’t want him to see her dull eyes and turned her head away to the other side, she hated that he wanted to see her without her glasses but he didn’t care, putting his palm on her cheek to turn her head back, placing a soft kiss of her left eyelid.

„Because it was my past“, he whispered against her skin before he kissed her right eyelid softly. „But you’re my future.“

And in that moment she knew she couldn’t say no to the offer.

* * *

 After four months and six operations in a city so far away from him that he had only been able to afford to come over two times and many phone calls it was the day that should change her life. The doctors had told her that they would take the bandage off her eyes for the first time. She didn’t know if she could see or not, the doctors didn’t know either.

Her whole body was shaking in anticipation and fear when a few people came in and went out again and she just didn’t know when it was time. For a second she thought about just ripping them off herself because she just couldn’t wait anymore.

The time had been a nightmare, she had been in pain so often and without him, the pain was even stronger. She had heard his voice through the phone every day, sometimes even twice but she missed his touch, his strong arms wrapped around her when they were cuddling, his breathing in the morning, his nose nuzzling her neck as soon as he woke up, just everything.

She had cried many times, especially at night when she had just missed him sharing a bed with her. He was her everything and from time to time she had even been afraid that she would lose him, that the operations maybe weren’t able to fix her and he would leave her because he had sold his boat and it still didn’t work but every time they had talked through the phone he had told her how much he loved her and it had made everything better.

People came in again and she knew they were all around her bed, she heard how they closed the curtains to dim the light a little.

„Ready, Miss Swan?“

The doctors voice sounded neutral, not positive, not negative and she was shaking even more, not able to speak so she just nodded, the fear inside of her almost killing her.

She pressed her eyes shut when she felt his hands taking the bandage off, the cool air rushing against the warm skin that had been covered by the bandage all the time but she just couldn’t open her eyes, was too afraid that it didn’t work, that she wasn’t able to see anything.

The doctors gave her time, didn’t push her or anything and she was so grateful because right now she needed to catch a breath while her whole body was shaking.

„Come on, love. Look at me.“

A frown showed up on her forehead when she heard him, his voice, he couldn’t be here, right? He had no money left to come here, it was probably all in her head but what if? A sob left her throat and she finally opened her eyes slowly, so slow that she wasn’t even sure that she was really doing it.

Her vision was blurred in the dim room but the more she opened her eyes the more she could see the figured around her, first only shadows without a form until they finally got more details and a smile showed up on her face.

And then she saw _him_.

His big dorky smile, his dark hair, his stubble and his blue eyes looking right at her just like she had imagined it. It had worked. All the time she had spent here, all the pain she had went through, it had been worth it in the end. She could see him and he was everything she could wish for.

„Killian,“ she choked out and her voice broke when she started to cry, she dropped her head and buried her face in her hands, not believing that it was happening.

Only a second later he sat at the edge of her bed, pulling her into a hug, so strong that she might be afraid that she couldn’t breathe anymore but it was exactly what she needed. He was here, she could see him and his heart was beating so fast in his chest that it made her smile even through she was crying into his shirt.

„Am I that ugly that you need to cry?“

He laughed softly and she joined him in his laughter before she pulled back in pure joy, the vision now only blurred from the tears that were in her eyes but she could still see the blue in his, sea blue and she smiled even more before she leaned forward and kissed him with so much emotion that she couldn’t even describe it anymore.

When she pulled back the dropped her forehead against his and smiled, her eyes closed again because it still hurt but it was okay as long as he was here.

„You’re an idiot“, she whispered and he laughed softly, placing a kiss on her nose.

„I know. But I’m not leaving anytime soon, you’re stuck with me. I can stay until they release you and we can go home. Together.“

She smiled and opened her eyes against for a few seconds to look him into his blue ones and she just knew that home was the place where he was.

He was her home.


	4. Colds And Chicken Soup

**Summary:** _AU in which Killian and Emma have been friends for four years and he always takes care of her when she's sick but this night turned out different than she had expected._

**Rated:** _T_

* * *

 „I'm coming over to bring you your favourite chicken soup from Granny's!“

Emma laughed at his stubborn nature. They had been talking over the phone for at least fifteen minutes, he wanted to come over to take care of her while she was almost dying because of her stupid cold and she told him to stay home because she didn't want to infect him, it was bad enough that she was sick, both of them would be horrendous.

„Killian, I—“ she started but then she already heard the sounds that told her he had already hung up on her. She huffed and shook her head, turning around on her bed until she was comfortable again. He was an idiot, a really stupid idiot.

She had a stuffy noise and pain in her throat since this morning and he had already been playfully pissed that she hadn't told him right away because 'that's what best friends do.'

They really were best friends, for about four or five years. More like four because the first year he had moved here she had hated him. Kind of. When he had moved to Storybrooke, he opened up a flower shop and was some kind of cocky bastard who literally flirted with everyone.

She hated that.

Sometimes she had to seperate him and some guy in a bar fight at the Rabbit Hole because David was already home with Mary Margret and she had gotten the night shift at the station.

But the more often he had sat in the cell, the more they had started to talk and at some point, his attitude towards had changed, he wasn't that idiot anymore, he was actually really nice with some kind of tragic past.

They found out that they were something like kindred spirits, having survived a different past with loss of beloved people.

After around a year they had become friends, really good friends and today they were best friends. He cared about her, a lot and she cared about him more than she had ever cared about someone. They were moments where she thought she might even have feelings for him but she was too afraid to act on them, not wanting to destroy what they have. She didn't have many friends in her life, so she wasn't ready to lose what she had with him.

Sure, there were David and Mary Margret and Ruby but they couldn't be compared with Killian. He was special, he was like her, not broken but bend and over the years, they had healed together.

He would hold her in her sleep when the nightmares took over, she would try to cheer him up on the death day of his brother with lots of ice cream and stupid movies.

She was thankful to have him in her life, he made it better, so much better. He was kind and caring and always a gentleman with her, tried to help her whenever he could, just like today.

Killian knew that the chicken soup from Granny's always made her feel better when she was sick but she couldn't make it outside, she felt way too weak. When he had called her earlier to ask where she had been he had immediately known that something was wrong and now here she was, waiting for him to bring her the soup. He had a key to her apartment so she wouldn't have to get up and could just stay in her bed.

The blonde didn't realize she was drifting off to sleep more and more.

Only the sound of the doorbell pulled her back into reality and she yawned, glancing at the clock with a frown, cursing herself when she realized she had fallen asleep about an hour ago but Killian was still not here and he wouldn't use the doorbell.

Emma got out of bed, the blanket around her body while she walked towards the door with slow and weak steps, opening it to look into David's eyes that were filled with worry.

„David? I didn't expect you to—“

She immediately stopped when she saw what he had in his hands. It was Killian's jacket, right next to a soup container and a bouquet of flowers. Her eyes snapped back to David who looked so sorry that it was hurting her.

„What happened?“ she asked in a hoarse voice, tears already filling her eyes because she knew that David had the shift and she knew Killian would never leave his jacket anywhere, he had gotten it from his brother, the only memory he had left of the man he had adored all his life.

And she knew that she was Killian's emergency contact.

„He...he didn't see it coming. The car..it just—"

The man broke off, he had been friends with Killian for a while now too, they had been mates. As soon as the words left his mouth Emma's eyes widened in shock and she took a step back, feeling her stomach turn upside down.

„He didn't make it.“

Emma just stumbled back, grateful for her kitchen table and the chairs, just falling down on one while David walked inside, placing the items on the table while tears were running down her cheeks and she buried her face in her hands, shaking her head over and over again.

„No. No," she sobbed and David kneeled down next to her, pulling her into a tight hug.

Killian couldn't be gone. She had to be dreaming, this had to be a nightmare and when she woke up, he would hold her in his arms, telling her that she was okay. Yes, that had to be it, there was no other explanation.

„I'm sorry, I can't stay but I will send Mary Margret over, okay?“

Emma didn't even listen to him, her thoughts running wild with images of Killian flashing in front of her eyes, his smile, his blue gaze, his laughter, his flirting. Her whole body was shaking and she barely felt David's warm body leaving hers, she didn't hear the door shut, just turned on her chair to place her arms on the table, putting her head down to cry.

She didn't know how long it had been until she realized that it was no dream.

Killian was dead, had left her.

When she had no tears to cry anymore she turned her head, her eyes red and puffy, her gaze falling on the item's. She straighened her back, her body still shaking but mostly she felt numb right now. The soup was already cold and a small smile was playing on her lips when she took the flowers, most likely to be from his shop.

There was a card in it and she frowned, taking it out of the bouquet, opening it and if she would have tears left, she would have started to cry and break down as soon as she read the words on it.

_'We've been friends for the last four years. Let's be lovers for the rest of our lives."_

He loved her.

Killian Jones loved her and he didn't even get the chance to tell her in person.

And it was only now she realized she had loved him too, maybe had loved him all along.


	5. The Last Goodybe

**Summary:** _5x14 never ended how it did and Milah is able to move on._

**Rated:** _G_

* * *

 

He couldn't help but smile brightly at the scene in front of him.

The young boy hugging the older woman after meeting her for the first and sadly last time. He could actually see some similarities between Henry and Milah while he watched them exchanging their goodbyes.

She had been a helping hand in his rescue and he had been speachless at first. Seeing her again after all those years of trying to avenge her death was...something different. He had expected them to meet again when he died but not like this, not in this place that was worse than hell.

And now there they were again and the path to heaven had opened up for her. He knew now that he didn't need to kill the crocodile to save her soul, they had just to finish her business down here. It had made his stomach flop when he had heard that he had been part of that business.

He had loved this woman with all his heart and soul, still did. His first love, the one that taught him so many things he didn't knew in his younger years, things that he still valued a lot. The one that had smiled brightly at him in the morning, the one that had been taken from him too early.

Killian felt how his hand was being squeezed and he looked down, then up into Emma's eyes. She was looking at him with a smile and he hadn't realized that Henry was done with his Goodbye and that it would be his turn now.

The last goodbye, a real one this time. Not some fleeing 'I love you' he had never the chance to return when she had died in his arms back then.

„Go“, Emma whispered to him and let go of his hand, pushing him forward a little.

He had expected it to be more awkward, Emma and Milah being here with him but they were on the same level and had gotten along great for the short time they had spent together and he couldn't be more grateful for that. Seeing his first and last love like this made his heart jump.

Milah looked at him with the same bright smile he still remembered when he walked towards where she was standing, ready to make her last walk to a better place.

He stood in front of her, scratching behind his ear, not sure what to say. What do you say to the first big love of your life now that you've gotten a second chance to give her a real goodbye? He had no clue.

It hurt to let her go again but he knew he had no choice.

„I guess this is it“, he mumbled and looked into her eyes, the ones that were still so familiar to him, even after centuries.

She laughed softly and smiled at him. „I guess it is.“

He swallowed hard but before he could say something else, she was pulling him into a strong hug, one that basically screamed a goodbye that was forever. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling her scent one last time.

„It's going to be okay, Killian. I'm going to be okay“, she whispered into his ear and he had a hard time swallowing down the sob that was rising in his throat.

Milah ran her hand over his hair in a calming way before she pulled away from him, so she was able to look him into the eyes.

„I just wish we would have gotten more time“, he said and took a deep breath, trying to keep his feelings in check. „I want to tell you so many things and-“

„Killian“, she stopped him and put a hand on his cheek, his rough scruff scratching against her soft hand. „Don't make it harder than it already is. Just promise me one thing, okay?“

He tilted his head slightly and raised his eyebrow after she removed her hand, telling her to go on without words.

Milah looked over to Emma who stood there with Henry in her arm, smiling at the two of them. He looked over his shoulder to look at them too, biting his bottom lip.

„I see how happy they make you and you them. Don't let them go. Ever.“, Milah said and when he looked back, he could see her tear up.

He laughed softly and shook his head for a moment. „I didn't plan to“, he replied. „Thank you, for everything. Send Baelfire my regards.“

Killian moved forward and gave her one more hug before taking a step back, swallowing hard.

„And you keep me an eye on this one, alright?“, Milah suddenly said, looking first at Emma, then at him. Both woman laughed and Killian blushed slightly while looking between them.

„Don't worry, I won't take my eyes off him“, Emma replied and reached with her hand for his which he took gladly, needing the support, needing to know that she was here and everything would be okay.

When he, Emma and Henry stood together back in a row, they watched how Milah smiled at them one last time before she turned around, walking towards the light.

One single tear was escaping him while he watched her leaving, finally going to be reunited with her son in a better place after all those years.


	6. Somewhere In Neverland

**Summary:** _He had been Captain Hook for quite some while now but this was the first time he met a Lost Girl._

 **Rated:** _G_

**[Visual Aid](http://torturedkillianjones.tumblr.com/post/141281804198/you-know-the-warrior-girl-that-jen-plays-in) **

* * *

 His body was aching when he went off his ship, he didn't even know for how long they have been gone, three months? Time flew fast when you were drinking in taverns and sleeping with women instead of actually figuring out a plan to get his revenge.. Besides that, time wasn't time here in Neverland, it wasn't relevant, the clocks ticked differently.

Sometimes he and his crew just had to take off the island, enjoy some actual grown up company in every way, fighting against someone their height instead of children. At the end of the day, he would have to return anyway until he found a way to kill the crocodile and to stay away forever.

Now he was exhausted, bruised from the last fight against a Navy ship they had crossed paths with on their way back and he just wanted his peace.

After some last orders he made his way towards a rather secret spot, secret from his crew at least. He was quite sure that Pan knew of it, that nasty kid had always been good in playing king for a place without rules.

A small smile played across his lips when he arrived at the small lagoon in a cave, hidden by trees and bushes. The only place where he could find true peace for at least a while until Pan showed up or his crew needed him.

He was about to enter the cave, could already feel the soothing sound of nothing in his ears when suddenly an arrow flew right past his face, cutting his cheek and getting stuck in the tree right in front of him.

„Bloody hell“, he grumbled and drew his sword, turning around but seeing no one. His eyes looked around hastily, trying to see any movements in his surroundings but he couldn't make out a single person. The setting sun wasn't helping at all.

„Leave“, a voice appeared and he frowned, it wasn't Pan that was for sure. The devil wouldn't shoot arrows at him anyway and just grin smugly at him.

„Say that to my face“, he yelled back into the woods, only hearing some rustling from fleeing birds for a second until a figure landed directly in front of him. Of course, the trees. Those kids are always in the trees.

To his surprise, the figure turned out to be a very female one, not one of those rotten boys he was used to. For a second he was taken completely off guard and it gave the girl enough time to hold the wodden sword right under his neck.

Her blonde curls were tied together with a ribbon at the end, her green eyes sparkling with anger, war paint in her face as if all of that would be some kind of game.

He raised his eyebrows, she was something new. Since when took Pan girls in? Especially that...old? As much as he tried, he couldn't remember seeing her around. Maybe she had never left camp? Or she was really the newest addition to Pan's collecting of Lost Boys. Girls. Whatever.

„And you are?“, he asked, not really impressed by the wood digging into his Adam's apple but he was smart enough to know that Pan enchanted all the weapons of his Lost Boys and that the girl was able to cut his throat with it if she wanted to.

„You're Captain Hook“, she said with a firm voice, a voice filled with anger and hatred. Normally women only reacted this way if she knew him already, not before.

„Thank you for telling me that, I'd have never realized it“, he replied and lifted his hook to wave it around in the air with a smug but bored grin on his lips, watching her reaction closely in case she decided to actually do something with that sword of hers.

„You're a fool to walk on the island alone, Pan wants you dead“, she huffed, digging the sword a little down his throat and he sighed, feeling how his skin was digging into the quite sharp blade.

„So what? Am I supposed to be afraid now? You don't even know how to hold this weapon, love.“ He would laugh if the movement wouldn't probably cause his skin to get cut and his cheek was already bleeding so he didn't need that to happen too.

„Who says I can't ho-“, she started but didn't came far because it only took a couple of seconds to disarm her and push her against the next tree, her wrists both trapped under his hook and against the tree, limiting her movement.

„I do“, he said with a smirk, looking over her. Seventeen the most. Four years younger than him. Four years older than the usual Lost Boys. He frowned and looked her straight in the eye.

If he wouldn't know better he would say that Pan was playing tricks on his tired mind. That this girl wasn't real but the devilboy would never be able to let him hallucinate a girl with such a wild storm raging behind her eyes.

Maybe it was Pan who had grown tired of only male company. A shrudder ran through his body just thinking of that. Gross.

„Listen girl. I have no idea where you come from, what you're doing here or who the hell you are but attacking an unarmed man out of a tree? Bad form. Why don't you go back to play with the other Lost...Children?“ He tilted his head slightly and couldn't help but be amused by her trying to wiggle out of his grasp while throwing insults at him.

„Aren't you a little too old to be one of them anyway?“, he suddenly asked her and she stopped her movement, her face going blank before gritting her teeth.

„That's none of your business“, she let out between her teeth. „Let me go!“

„If I let you go, you leave. Come back when you can hold a sword properly because the next time, I won't be this merciful.“ With that, he pulled the hook from the tree and she dropped to her knees while he took a step back, kicking her sword further away in case she wanted to grab it.

For a moment he watched her how she fisted her hands angrily in the dirt and he was curious what she was thinking. None of his Lost Boys had been so keen on killing him before, so why her? And why a girl at all? That was so...not Pan. There had to be a bigger plan behind it.

He didn't even turn around before he walked into the cave but even minutes later while he was shrugging his coat off to get into the water of the lagoon, his thoughts were still with the girl that hopefully went back to their camp.

She was different than all those other kids. There was something about her that he couldn't put his finger on it besides her gender and her age.

Killian sank down into the water and closed his eyes, sighing when he could feel the water easing his pain away but the only thing he could see before her was her face reflecting anger and hate at him even through they had never met before.

When he looked up at the cave wall, he realized it.

Her eyes were different. She didn't share the same look the other kids had, the look that screamed lost.

But if she wasn't lost, why is she here?


	7. Brother, Oh Brother

**Summary:** _Liam is the only family he has left and he's not going to give up on him._

**Rated:** _G_

* * *

  _I'd follow you_  
_To the end of the world if only you would ask me to_  
_On and on we go, my brother_  
_I've got you_  
_Nothing to stop us now_  
_Because we found in life what's true_  
_Oh my brother_  
_I'd follow you_

No matter how often he walked these steps, it didn't get any easier. The white walls and the sterile smell were always the same. He should be used to it by now but he wasn't, would never be.

Killian looked at many familiar faces, nurses and doctors that knew him already, knowing he was here as often as he could. One one hand he hated the feeling of being here, the pityful looks in the eyes of everyone that knew him, on the other hand it was the only place where he was close to the only family he had left.

His brother, Liam.

The brother that had been in a coma since the last three years. The brother that was supposed to be in his place now.

The dark haired man opened the door to his brother's room and walked inside, putting his bag down on the chair while he looked over his brother.

„You really need a haircut“, he mumbled before walking over to the table besides the bed, frowning slightly at the fresh flowers with no card. Probably from a nurse so the room wouldn't look so empty.

Killian had never been a fan of bringing flowers, why would be? Liam was in a bloody coma, he wouldn't see them anyway and his first thought after waking up would probably not be 'Oh hey, look at those flowers!'

He huffed and shook his head, walking over to the window to look outside for a moment before going back to the chair to sit down. His hand roamed around in the bag for a moment, looking for the book he had brought. It was a new one this time, fresh from the store.

„Before you complain, it's a good one okay. I'm not going to read you Twenty Thousands Miles Under the Sea again, deal with it“, he said as if Liam could actually hear him and respond but he knew that was hopeless.

The doctors had said a while ago that it would be easier and better to turn the machines off but Killian had refused. He wasn't going to let the last remaining member of his family die, not when it was his fault that he was in this situation.

He closed the eyes and shook his head, trying not to think of the horrible accident that left his brother in a coma and himself with a barely functional hand.

“Remember when I told you that Peter Pan was actually a little shit? Well, this book proves it, just wait.” Killian settled down in the chair, taking his shoes off before placing his feet on the bed of his brother before he started to read loudly to him.

Ever since his brother had fallen into the coma, he had been doing this routine. Working as much as his body would let him so he could afford keeping Liam alive, then coming here late in the evening to read to his brother, knowing how much he had enjoyed reading books. For some reason Killian had always believed that reading would help but so far, nothing was changing.

Liam's condition was steady, not lethal but not very alive either. No matter what the doctors tried, there was no chance in any brain activity and to most, his brother was already a lost cause. Some nurses had whispered behind his back and called him foolish for letting the machines run for so much money but he had ignored it. He couldn't lose another person in his life, he just couldn't.

His mother, his father, Milah. Everyone was gone, taken from him like he didn't deserve any good things and now his brother was on the brink of death every day. They had told him that it was more likely to get a brain failure every day than him actually waking up.

Killian didn't want to hear it. Those doctors could kiss his arse. Maybe he was just stubborn, maybe he was just selfish but he wouldn't let his brother go as long as there was a tiny spark of hope left in him. He would wake up, one day.

He was so busy reading the new book to his brother that he didn't notice how someone came into the room and only when the door fell shut, he looked up and around to see a blonde woman standing in the room.

“I'm sorry, I didn't know someone was still here because visiting hours are over”, she said and looked apologetic at him with a small smile.

“Extra permission”, he said and sighed, closing the book. “I'll go if you have work to do here.”

But she just shook her head and came closer, leaning over his shoulder to look at the cover of the book, then into his eyes.

“I'm Emma. I'm the new nurse for this floor”, she told him with a brighter smile before she walked over to check on the machines. “You're Killian, I assume?”

He frowned at her for a long moment without saying a word, only to hear her laugh softly.

“You're quite known here, so I got to hear some stories. It's great what you're doing for your brother.” She typed something in the machines that were keeping his brother alive, the annoying beeping going louder for a second.

Most of the time he was able to ignore the sound, already way too used to it. He really spent too much time here.

“Aye. Killian Jones”, he said and tried to get a grip again, so confused by her presence. He never really met any other nurses, the only one he had ever met was Ratched and she hadn't been the nicest one.

“It's nice to meet you.” She came over to him and held her hand out which he took and shook slightly, smiling briefly at her. A rare smile if he was honest, he hadn't much things to smile about lately.

“Well then, keep reading, I will be back in three hours to check on him. Just as a warning, in case you're still here.”

With that she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her again and he looked after her way longer than he should.

After shaking his head he turned back towards his brother and let out a confused laugh. “Attracting all the hot ladies now, huh? Was Ratched not enough?”, he asked his brother and could basically hear the so familiar laugh in his mind.

The sad truth was, that he didn't even knew if he'd ever hear his brother laugh again.


	8. Cities Of Spice

**Summary:** _Killian takes Milah to the city he described to her on their first night in the tavern._

 **Rated:** _G **  
**_

* * *

"Cheer up, love. I'm sure your boy will be fine“, Killian tells her when he comes up from behind, wrapping his arms around her body like she's the most precious thing in his life.

She was, actually.

After months of meetings, she finally came to him and begged him to take her with him. Telling him how her husband was treating her like she was nothing, that she just couldn't do it anymore.

He asked her if she was sure over and over again but after a while he could hear nothing but her silent sobs against his shoulders and he quickly agreed to free her from her cage without bars.

Especially in the first days she had been happy and sad at the same time, happy to be free, sad that she had to leave her boy behind. He understood her, it hurt to let a part of your family go but she did it to give him his best chance.

A small kid on board of a pirate ship? The danger was greater than leaving him with his cowardly father who didn't even want to fight to take his wife back.

Ex wife now.

Milah had become more open after the first days on sea, after the sickness of traveling with the ship has left her body and she could finally breathe the air of the ocean that was so different.

But now and then, the creases on her forehead returned, especially at a cloudless night like this one where she stood at the railing, looking out on the ocean, thinking of her boy and if he would be well.

"We will go back for him, right? When he's older?“, she asked and turned in his arms, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"Of course, if that's what you want.“ His hand stroked up and down her back, trying to calm the storm he had seen in her eyes. „Wait until tomorrow and I've got a surprise for you.“

She lifted her head and looked at him with a raised eyebrow, confusion covering her features. „What is it?“, she asked carefully with a hint of suspicion in her voice.

Killian laughed and took her hand, placing a soft kiss on it. „You'll see tomorrow.“ He didn't let go of her hand and linked their fingers together, pulling her with him towards his cabin.

* * *

The next morning came fast and Killian woke before his beloved, leaving her behind to talk to his crew, making sure they arrive safely in port.

It was around noon when they finally arrived in the place he had always promised to show her. He took a deep breath while going from board, smelling the spice in the air.

He made sure to send some men of his crew to get some things he had written down on a list before he walked back on the ship right in the moment as Milah came out of his quarters.

"We're in port?“, she asked and tilted her head slightly but he just grinned at her, taking her hand and literally dragging her from port.

"Do you remember the first night we met?“, he asked her, wrapping her in his arms so his chest was pressed against his back, his chin resting on her shoulder while they both looked around the busy streets.

"Of course I do“, she replied and he could literally hear the confusion in her voice, so that he was unable to keep the chuckle in.

"Take a deep breath, love.“ She did as he said and he might not be able to see her face but he knew that she started to smile.

"This is the place you told me about“, Milah said, already so sure even with no confirmation from his side.

Killian let go of her, grabbing her hand instead and pulling her between the people roaming the streets.

"Aye, that it is. I've wanted to take you here as soon as possible. Spice in the air, people dressed completely different than what we're used to. Who knows, maybe we can find you one of those jeweled chairs. Care to look for one?“, he asked her with his most boyish grin and she couldn't help but smile at him.

"I'd love to“, she answered and stopped so she could lean up and press a soft kiss to his lips.

He might not be able to take the worry for her boy off her shoulders completely but he could make her forget for a while at least.


	9. I Want To Reconcile The Violence In Your Heart

**Summary** : _T_ _hey all have returned from the Underwold safely but Killian has issues with processing all of it. Emma wants to help him._

 **Rated:** _E_

[Visual Aid (NSFW)](https://45.media.tumblr.com/8578a7753340dcab3d94c93500a0144b/tumblr_o4kcs1aVfZ1rm1q4ao1_500.gif)

* * *

 It hurts her so see him like this.

The desperate look on his face when he woke up in the morning, the hurt and frustration in his eyes whenever she looked at him and he thought she wasn't looking. His general posure of being absolutely down and sad when he thought no one was around.

He could put on a mask quite well but that came probably with all his years of training, playing the part of Captain Hook, the villain in his own tale where he was supposed to be the hero. The villain that no one understood.

After they had returned from the Underworld, he had been like this. She knew that it would take time for him to recover, for everyone really. They had seen things and met people that would sit with them for a while but he had been the most to suffer.

Torture from Hades, ripped apart by Cerberus, loosing Milah without closure and sending Liam off to heaven. She knew that all those things were eating him alive but he also wasn't ready to talk about it yet. Of course not, she wouldn't be either.

But it made her feel so helpless to see him slumped down on the couch whenever she returned home, only to find him sitting up straighter when he saw her, trying to smile brightly at her. She didn't know what to do, didn't know how to help him to process all those things.

When she came home this time, she only heard the water running, knowing that it could only be him in the shower. He had taken a lot of showers actually since they returned, trying to get the dirt of the Underworld off him, probably hoping he could wash away his feelings too.

Emma sighed and hang her jacket over the chair, kicking her shoes off while walking towards the bathroom. When she opens the door she can see him, his stump leaning against the shower wall in front of him while his forehead is pressed against it, the water just running over his body without a single care in the world.

He wasn't moving, probably deep in thoughts, deep enough so that he didn't even hear her when she started to strip out of her clothes, leaving them on the ground before joining him in the shower.

Only when her naked form pressed against his from behind she felt how he stirred, lifting his head to look at her over his shoulder with a hint of confusion in his eyes.

Instead of answering his silent question, she just places a kiss to his shoulder, pushing him forward slightly so she was under the hot spray of water just like him. Her left hand moved up to his chest, stroking the hair there carefully while her other hand ran down to his cock which immediately sprang alive to her touch.

He hissed sharply when she gripped him, a soft moan escaping him quickly.

„What are you doing?“, he asked her with a rough voice that she hadn't been expected to come out of him like a rumble in a storm.

She laughed softly and places a kiss on his neck, biting the spot a little with her teeth, enough to make him hiss in a mix of pain and pleasure.

„I'm trying to cheer you up. Should I stop?“, she breathed against his skin, only whispering it barely loud enough for him to hear.

Her fingers ran up and down his shaft, her thumb rubbing over the tip to gather up the precum that was already leaking and it took him a long while to answer her.

„No“, was the simple reply that broke from his lips and she smiled, pressing herself even closer to him, letting him feel just how good her breast felt pressed against his back.

Emma let the fingers of her other hand pull on his nipple, causing him to groan and buck his hips into her hand. He was hard and heavy and it wouldn't take him long to spill.

What she didn't expect was for him to sneak his hand between them, finding her wet folds dripping just for him.

She frowned and lifted her head from his shoulder to look at him but when he turned his head all she could see was this stupid grin that she had missed for quite a while now. He leaned back a little so that he was able to press his lips against hers while two of his fingers found her entrance and thrusted up inside of her.

Both of them moaned at the feeling and he turned his head forward into a more comfortable position while searching for her clit with his thumb.

The blonde moaned at the feeling of his rough finger against her clit and only caused her to stroke him faster, giving her back a deep groan in return.

They found a rythm for their movement, his fingers pulling out when she was moving her hand up his cock, thrusting back inside of her when she was moving down.

„Emma, I-“, he stuttered and bucked his hips against her hand hard but he didn't even need to finish his sentence, her walls already fluttering around his fingers inside of her and with a few more strokes, she came around him while he spilled himself into her hand and on the shower floor.

She removed her hand from his cock and pulled him into another, tight embrace from behind and he sighed, turning around in her arms before returning the hug, placing a soft kiss on her wet hair.

„Shall I wash your hair, love?“, he suddenly asked without the edge in the voice that had been bothering her for the last days. She knew what he meant though.

 _I love you_ , he said without using the words.

„Yeah, I'd like that“, she replied with a smile and turned her back to him, handing him the shampoo, had always loved the feeling of his hand in her hair, not bothered by the stump at all.

 _I love you too_ , she replied without using the words.


End file.
